My daughter is obsessed with Tokio Hotel. If you don't know who they are, then you clearly do not have a 13-year-old budding rocker chick in your household. HOWEVER, this is your lucky day, as we are about to enlighten you. And to that end, I have agreed to publish this totally candid and completely unscripted interview with said daughter, J, in order to afford her the needed publicity to further her career as a, um, 13-year-old. And in keeping with my new obsession regarding posting YouTube videos here, there will, in fact, be a video, somewhere below. Oh, you can't resist.Me: Why do you like Tokio Hotel?
J: First of all, I love Bill's hair.
Me: Who's Bill?
J: Bill Kaulitz, the lead singer. Second, I just like their music.
Me: What is it about Bill?
J: I love his hair . . .
Me: You already said his hair. Describe his hair.
J: It's big, and black with some blonde and it's straight out, like everywhere.
Me: And you find this to be appealing?
J: Yes, I think it's amazing.
Me: And this Bill, he has his tongue pierced, yes? What about that?
J: He also has his eyebrow pierced and he wears a lot of makeup. And he has a twin brother, and his name is Tom and he has dreads.
Me: Given the choice between dreads and "big hair everywhere"?
J: Definitely big hair everywhere because I think dreads are gross and dirty.
Me: If Bill wanted to borrow your eyeliner, would you let him?
J: Um, yes.
Me: And what color would you give him?
J: Black and blue, well it's more like a green color, teal, that's what I'm going to call it . . .
Me: It's my duty as a parent to inform you that you should never share your eyeliner. You could get an eye infection.
J: But it's Bill!
Me: One last question: If Tokio Hotel were a kind of tree, what kind of tree would they be?
J: A rainbow tree.
Me: What does that mean?
J: I don't know but I like it.
Are you still with me? Good job! Okay here's that video I promised. But it's just of Tokio Hotel, so don't get too excited. You can just leave if you want. I won't be offended . . . HOWEVER, if you'd like a giggle, check out Bill's reaction at, oh, about :49, as they win the VMA for Best New Artist. It's actually quite entertaining . . .
Okay, daughter -- you owe me.
